Any suggestions?

I have tried everything, and I mean everything. If you are one to get turned off by reading TMI, I would stop now and turn back. There is not much you can tell me to go try that I can't say I have already done. This baby just DOES NOT want to come out of me. Now, most of you would say "well, you aren't even due for 3 more days!" Well, I DON'T CARE! I want him out! I don't want another c-section and the closer I get to being induced on Tuesday, the more chance there is of that.
I have walked more in the last week than in the whole 38 weeks prior to this. I have had "marital relations" up the wazoo, with the complaint from my husband that I am "wearing him out" (never knew that was possible with a man). I have rubbed and pushed on acupressure points I didnd't even know existed. I took a long WARM bath last night to relax him out (and I am not a warm bath kind of person, give me my HOT WATER!). I had a nice relaxing perdicure today and spicy mexican food for lunch...The results? Lots of mean contractions that have no consistancy but cause much uncomfortableness to the mama.
So, if there are any other suggestions out there as to how to get this baby out safely and into my arms, I am all ears. I just don't want to have to drink some oil or strange tea that I have never heard of that will just make me poop all over the place and cramp all night. And by the way, this heartburn needs to stop. It keeps me up for HOURS in the middle of the night while I listen to my sweet husband snoring away next to me.
And Parker, my ribs were not placed inside of me for your monkey entertainment. I know the Dr. said you were a long baby, but mama wasn't made to hold a long baby for this long! I want you to continue to grow and get strong, but outside of my uterus would be nice. Please listen to your mommy, daddy and big sister and COME OUT AND PLAY!
Sorry to everyone for the complaining. I am done for now. Just needed to vent a little. And since a post isn't a post without pictures, here are a few for your enjoyment!